Thursday, June 30, 2016

Faml300-03To Know

         Here is a topic that is so awkward to talk about. We avoid it at pretty much any cost. As a "Mormon" it is definitely something that I avoid talking about. We don't think it is appropriate to talk about, to the point that we most often avoid discussing it within marriage. Physical intimacy is that topic. I have heard it said that before marriage all you get on the topic is, "no, no, no!" Then you get married and all of a sudden it is, "go, go, go!". The thing is with the no's is that it makes people feel like intimacy is wrong. It is not wrong; it is beautiful and important---in the right setting.
        I think that a good way of explaining this is just like not anyone can go in an LDS temple, not even all members. You have certain steps leading to that. You have to get a temple recommend. For sexual relations you must first be married. Because of this so many people think that sexuality is just inappropriate and must be endured just to have children. I have heard that a lot of people have a really hard time with intimacy within marriage, because they feel guilty. They feel like they are going against what they were taught all their lives. So what can be done once already married?

Image result for wedding rings
        My husband and I try really hard to have open conversation on this topic. Yes, it can be awkward, but the more that we are open with each other and allow it to be a no judgement topic, things just work out so much better. We should be comfortable sharing with our spouse if we are uncomfortable and then be able to discuss what will help the issue. In the scriptures the term "to know" is used when discussing marriages/intimacy. It is much more than a mere physical act. It is one way in which we can become "one flesh", which is also a scriptural term.
       This is something that has to be worked on all the time; most things in marriage are ongoing, improving, learning experiences. I am working on being more patient, loving, and understanding with my husband in all areas of our relationship and intimacy is definitely one of those things that needs to be continually worked on--it will greatly enhance marital satisfaction.

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